Homes and Watsup take to the sand — “On the sea shore, Homes?” I asked. “Are you — um, certain?” “Quite certain, Watsup,” said Shylock Homes. “It is the classic business model. People who come to the seaside are minded to collect seashells. My old acquaintance Mrs Pallio employs local urchins — by which of course I mean…

Can you resist? — Come along, people, gather round for today’s lesson. Are we all here? No? Where’s Three? Got by a hunter? Oh well, can’t be helped. We’ll carry on without her. It’s what she would have wanted. Today’s lesson is about the gift of our friends the Twolegs. Now, Twolegs are very…

Sitting by the stream of consciousness — [Author’s note — I was puzzled and/or disappointed not to see this published in Hinged 326. Imagine my chagrin, when coming back to check, to discover that the Submit button was still waiting for me to click it. Oh well… better out than in.] Clothespins? What is clothespins? Pegs, it’s…

Numquam Extinguit — Welcome, everyone. I see some of you already have the visitors’ guidebook — if not, it’s available at the Gift Shop on your way out — and if you’ve read it, you’ll know that while parts of Lanthorn House date from mediaeval times, what we see today was built mostly…

Fold up and eat — “Would you like pepper pony on your pizza?” The child nodded eagerly at her grandfather’s question. “And origami, please?” “Of course. For you, nothing but the best.” He busied himself with slicing and grating and careful arrangement of ingredients before topping it all off with the dried green herb. …

It’s magic — “Three, two, one — abracadabra!” Jimmy tapped the handcuffs with the wand, and they fell open. I raised my freed hands in triumph. The audience erupted in applause. Jimmy bowed, drinking it all in. He never told me how the illusion (“It’s not a trick! I don’t do tricks!”) worked…

Coming to the point — “They’re doing WHAT!!!” Edgar’s training as an actor was paying off again. Every one of the three question marks was audibly straightened. They cowered together at the loud end of the sentence, standing to attention and trying not to shiver. “They’re levelling raised and sunken ironworks,” his wife (who had…

Who knows what may be inside? — The Anarachi Book Of Quells is among the most curious of all religious texts. Adherents to the Doctrine of Anarach revere it, without ever having read it or even seen it: they believe it was handed to Anarach to be memorised, then taken away (or, in some versions of the…

An Halloweenegory — Hey, you, blacksmith. I hear you’re the best in the business, right? In that case, I have a job for you. First, can we go somewhere more quiet? I have trouble with noise, you see. And a few other things. Like, do you see my lips moving? That’s right, you’re…